Competing Opinions

I have been struggling with something for some time, something that seems to be present everywhere I go...opinions.  Now I am not saying opinions are a bad thing, because we all are entitled to them and we all have them,  I am referring to how people share them and the violent manner in which some people respond when they react to opinions they don't agree with.

 I think in a time and age that opinions can be shared with the entire world on Twitter, Facebook, and blogs like mine there needs to be some consideration given to how one presents their opinion.  Through out the day I hear and see people share their opinions, I have found some that are eloquent and open minded when sharing their opinion and then there are others who seem to be under the misguided impression that their opinion should be the only opinion for everybody.  These people present their opinions in a manner that dares anyone to disagree with them, under the impression that theirs is the only opinion acceptable.  These opinions often include , but are not limited to breastfeeding, where to live, what car everyone should drive, the best diet, diet-life choices, exercise, what cell phone carrier is the best, when the board results came out last year, Navy regulations, life choices, and the list goes on and one.

We all know the saying about opinions and how they are like something else everyone else has...but in reality we all have one.  Where this opinion comes from is unique for each and every person. Our upbringing, our past, our morals, our values, what we personally are committed to, and knowledge all contribute to the formation of our opinion.  Looking at opinions is like looking at snowflakes, they are all unique.  So, when sharing yours know that it is YOURS and may be YOURS ALONE.  shoving your life choices or opinions on others is like trying to make your finger print match some else's.  

I have come to a point where I tend to keep my opinion to myself on Facebook and other social media.  I have seen someone ask a simple question like, "Where is the best place on island to get your hair colored?" and have it turn into an all out drama, filled with warring opinions.  First of all, who has the energy to fight with strangers over the best place to get your hair colored, and second of all, everyone's hair is different so what may work for you may not work for me.  My former stylist in Hawaii was like a sister to me, and when I moved to Guam I was not looking for a stylist who wanted to chat and talk while she did my hair because I was not looking for someone to replace her, I wasn't looking for a friend, I just needed someone competent to do my hair. Maybe you are the person who likes to chit chat while you get your hair done, which would make our opinions...GASP...different!

Additionally, as we experience life we often form opinions based on experience and lessons learned.  For example, a new Navy wife is going to have a much different opinion than that of a 26 year Master Chief’s wife.  The Master Chief’s wife has experienced much more than the new Navy wife, and has formed opinions based on those experiences.  Another factor is there is most likely a generation between the Master Chief’s wife and the new Navy wife, which will give them  different perspectives in shaping their opinions.  Is either of them right or wrong?  They are both right ! I know, I know some of you over opinionated people out there can’t handle two people being right, at the same time, about the same thing. However, they are both right because they are forming their opinions based on personal experience and knowledge.  The key to harmony is each of them respecting the others individual opinion.

Living in a military community cannot be experienced anywhere else in the world.  You are bringing thousands of people at different stages of their career and life, from different parts of the world, with different family backgrounds and upbringings, and different education levels and experiences together, inside a gate under often-stressful situations.  All of us need to learn to respect the value of each other’s opinions and take into account the things that make up our differences.

We are entitled to our opinions, but remember if you are entitled to yours, someone else is also entitled to theirs.  Let’s use some maturity and grace when sharing or listening to each other’s opinions.