The Family

The Family

Saturday, June 15, 2013

It Takes Strength and Maturity Part One

On this Sunday morning as I returned from dropping my husband off on the boat I was pondering my crazy lifestyle. You see the boat is supposed to be gone, however, true to Sub Life she returned to port Friday for a repair, and is considering departing today. I love when I get these surprise visits from my husband and I treasure everyone of them. However, as any Sub Wife will tell you as great as these visits are...they play with your emotions. You see when you have a husband who is out to sea and communication is done by an unreliable email system, where not much should be said, as they are screened for security reasons you get into a certain frame of mind. This frame of mind has an end goal...the return date. You begin to build your plans around this date, this is the goal that you strive to reach, the countdown that tells you, you can do it...your focused. You have a plan that includes the distraction of potlucks and activities with your friends (who pun intended are often in the same boat as you are), you have exercise and weight goals, you have household projects, craft projects, and work projects. You are focused and because you are a Sub Wife you are ready to deal with this. You are almost militant about keeping everything in check...so that your emotions will remain in check. Then BOOM...here comes the boat into the harbor and you are so excited to see him and grateful to spend time with him...that you lose focus and the goal is temporarily not important. You let your emotions and senses drink in all of him, things get off track with your goals. Then comes the morning you have to drive him to that pier and watch him go again. For me personally, it takes a great deal more strength to say good bye to him a second time half way through the deployment than it does to say good bye the first time. Maybe because the first time I get myself together, I have had time to prepare for it and I am ready to face it head on. But the second time he has returned and I have now given into those emotions and allowed myself to taste a little bit of him being home. Once they leave it takes me a couple of days to get on track and back in the grove. I promise you its not as easy as it sounds especially if you have children, the poor things don't know if Dad's coming or going. It takes a great deal of strength to get your emotions back where they belong and not give into the pull of allowing yourself just one day of moping...because one will turn in to two, which will then become a week. So to my fellow Sub Wives...we've got this, we can do it, all we have to do is get our target in sight, lock in, and launch ourselves towards the end goal...HOMECOMING!!!

1 comment:

  1. I tend to agree with everything you say anyways so, no shocker here, I think this sums up every feeling I have today! Thank you Jill for using your words to speak for so many of us who may have a little bit of trouble getting our thoughts together into one sensible paragraph!

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